 It’s a fantastic April morning. The sky is a hopeful and promising blue. The birds are singing songs filled with lust. And I am sitting here in the garden, coming to a frustrating realization: I hate my spoodle. Beware the expertise of others and the tips they bring you. (Me included.)
First, you’re probably asking what in the name of the Holy Mother Of Pearl is a “spoodle” anyway. It’s the logical yet awful contractional name for a tool that is part spoon, part ladle while bringing the best qualities of neither implement. Yes, it sounds like a breed of dog which is a cross between a spaniel and a poodle. Maybe it is. If so, keep it out of my kitchen and away from the pizza. The spoodle is basically a flat-bottomed ladle with little to no angle in the handle. It was recommended as the ideal instrument for spreading pizza sauce. The recommendation came from the writers of an epic book about pizza making.
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 The Ongoing Modernist Pizza Review, Volume 3, Chapter 12, "Iconic Recipes," Part 4 Modernist Pizza Written by Nathan Myhrvold and Francisco Migoya Published by The Cooking Lab; First edition, October 19, 2021 Hardcover: 1708 pages, 32.7 pounds, 13.78 x 10.24 x 15.94 inches List Price: $425.00 Amazon discount price as of 03/08/23: $294.99 Perhaps there is hope for us regular folks as pizzamakers after all. The section of Chapter 12, "Iconic Recipes," beginning “Thick Crust Pizza” is another excellent, concise overview of pan pizza technical details and aesthetics. And something in there is eerily familiar.
In the section of “Thick-Crust Key Characteristics," there’s a photo of an “open crumb structure” crust. That photo makes me feel better about my own Detroit-style pizzas. They look shockingly similar. If I’m approaching anything Mhyrvold & Migoya approve as desirable, it makes me feel like I’m yet again doing something else correctly. The photos in Modernist Pizza can be very helpful in providing an aesthetically pleasing yet technically useful illustration of what this stuff should look like in process. This includes the beauty shots (of which there are many, many alluring examples). But it's also about the process shots within the recipes. And once again, who doesn’t love an exploded view photo of a pizza? This time, it’s a Detroit-style Red Top Pizza, as they call it (or a “red stripe” pizza as I originally learned it).  This is one of the easiest possible pizzas to make. And it happens by not trying to make pizza.
OK, what does that mean, and is it some kind of stupid zen koan about pizza? Granted, that could be the case. I have all kinds of half-baked zen thoughts about the "not doing" of things. But that’s not what’s going on here. This is much simpler and more on-the-nose.  The Ongoing Modernist Pizza Review, Volume 3, Chapter 12, "Iconic Recipes," Part 3 Modernist Pizza Written by Nathan Myhrvold and Francisco Migoya Published by The Cooking Lab; First edition, October 19, 2021 Hardcover: 1708 pages, 32.7 pounds, 13.78 x 10.24 x 15.94 inches List Price: $425.00 Amazon discount price as of 03/08/23: $294.99 Move aside, Neapolitan pizza—folks are ready to start hurling the Chicago deep-dish! But the Modernistas remain unemotional and clear-eyed, of course. And they could not possibly be smarter about it. I think. (There will be mac and cheese involved…)
In the recipes section for deep-dish, Mhyrvold & Migoya get right to it: “Whether deep-dish is really a pizza or not is the subject of many heated debates (based largely on where you call home). Some feel strongly that it’s pizza while others feel just as strongly that deep-dish pizza is closer to a casserole.”  Finding your way with pizza is a fantastic thing. The first time you pull a bubbling out pizza out of the oven and your home starts to smell like a pizzeria with the mingling aromas of hot meats and caramelized crust and toasted semolina and you can’t help yourself and you begin salivating as you take that first hot hot hot bite that’s just a little too too hot hot because you couldn’t wait and your tongue curses you and loves you simultaneously as the taste fills your mouth and the scent fills your head and your body is filled with a feeling that wells up inside you and you realize, oh, yes, this is it: Actual pizza joy…
Well, that’s a powerful moment. This is the beginning of something big. You are beginning to find your pizza mojo. But um… what the heck is mojo, anyway?  The Ongoing Modernist Pizza Review, Volume 3, Chapter 12, "Iconic Recipes," Part 2Modernist Pizza Written by Nathan Myhrvold and Francisco Migoya Published by The Cooking Lab; First edition, October 19, 2021 Hardcover: 1708 pages, 32.7 pounds, 13.78 x 10.24 x 15.94 inches List Price: $425.00 Amazon discount price as of 03/08/23: $294.99 And so the section on Neapolitan pizza begins: “Neapolitan pizza has influenced every other style of pizza in the world, yet it shares very little with those styles in terms of appearance, texture and flavor.”
I’m not going to say, “Tell us something we don’t know.” Not everyone knows that—especially if they just opened the book, bypassing two volumes of sensible intel for the “action” of the recipes. (Note: Treating this 3-volume epic as a cookbook is a tragic mistake and a waste of money. There is so much more at work here.) Mhyrvold & Migoya outline key characteristics that do seem have already been sufficiently beaten throughout the book. But this IS the baking chapter, after all. And in the process of enduring such redundancy, we get all kinds of new stuff.  As I approach pizza this morning, I find there’s a chunk of a lyric from a Marcia Ball song stuck in my head: “A little too little and a lot too much.”
If you don’t know about the 6-foot-ish Marcia Ball, she of the dark hair with the white streak, the woman recognized as “Her Tallness” is a piano player and singer. Miss Marcia’s music is something the Boston Globe once described as “an irresistible celebratory blend of rollicking, two-fisted New Orleans piano, Louisiana swamp rock and smoldering Texas blues from a contemporary storyteller." That single line is a far more concise and invigorating a description than I could ever muster. Marcia Ball can tear the roof off the joint. Seen her do it many times, in front of huge crowds and in small clubs. But the more pressing question is: What does any of this have to do with pizza?  I love getting email from readers of Free The Pizza. Lately, there are all kinds of exciting developments for my pizza newbies. There’s the guy from a restaurant-business family who’s excited to be buying his first pizza steel to replace his pizza stone.
There are a couple of portable outdoor oven owners who’ve found value in the “purpose and intent” paradigm of Free The Pizza. It has helped them master their outdoor ovens. (That’s fascinating to me, since I focus on the home oven.) Another pizza newbie was finding his big green kamado cooker to be a lousy pizza oven. After using my book to crank great pizza out of his home oven, he canceled his order on a $1,200 wood-fired dome oven. |
AuthorBlaine Parker is the award-winning author of the bestselling, unusual and amusing how-to pizza book, Free The Pizza. Also known as The Pizza Geek and "Hey, Pizza Man!", Blaine is fanatical about the idea that true, pro-quality pizza can be made at home. His home. Your home. Anyone's home. After 20 years of honing his craft and making pizza in standard consumer ovens across the nation, he's sharing what he's learned with home cooks like you. Are you ready to pizza? Archives
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