Elevating pizza and other stuff: Meet the magic of roasted mushrooms and their face-first flavor punch.

Last week, I had a vegetarian at the table. Not a pescatarian. Not a covert, bacon-loving grazer. Nope. A full-fledged, non-vegan vegetable devotee.
 
This was daunting. I was concerned.
 
Around town, my pizza has a reputation. Strangers find out who I am and say, “Heyyyy,  I’ve heard about you!”
 
And you know what that means: recipe for potential disappointment.

Now, I had to face the double whammy of potentially disappointing a non-omnivore whose standards for vegetarian fare were higher than my own because hey--I don't have one. 
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REWIND: The other day, we were in a situation.
 
The Fabulous Honey Parker and I were in a social scenario at a community event. It quickly locked us into an oft-discussed commitment to serving pizza to The Local Vegetarian.
 
But this time, we set an imminent date and I now had a deadline to come up with a menu.
 
Cheese pizza? No brainer!

It’s one of my favorite pizzas because it offers nowhere to hide. The pizzamaker lives or dies by the cheese pizza.
 
 
My trademark cheese pizza is something I call Cheese On Cheese Action.
 
It involves my signature sauce of Bianco DiNapoli tomatoes (seasoned to a New York pizza flavor profile), low-moisture whole-milk mozzarella as well as fresh mozzarella, and Pecorino Romano.
 
It’s all baked to a strategic char, then finished with a drizzle of good olive oil and a healthy shake of dried oregano for that unmistakable New York slice-shop pop.
 
(It’s fun watching people respond to that. They’re eating this cheese pizza that tastes familiar yet more rich and complex than they’re used to, and they’re trying to figure out what the herby flavor is. It’s a little like Proust’s Madeline--which you've probably never heard about, and which makes me look like a pretentious hack. So it goes! Check it out and you can throw it around at cocktail parties, too!)
 
 
Then, I have a pizza with the working title of Veg Head.
 
There’s the sauce as described above, low-moisture and fresh mozzarella (once again), pecorino Romano, halved grape tomatoes, broccoli florets, chopped leeks, fresh garlic and bacon with an olive oil drizzle before baking.
 
Again, a no-brainer pizza—except for when the vegetarian meets the bacon.
 
After mulling it over, I threw in the towel: soy-based bacon bits it is!
 
If the fatty, smoky, salty, crispy component was more about those flavors than anything to do with actual pork involved, why not give it a shot? I really don’t enjoy “food fakery.” But sometimes, you just have to say, “Oh, hell. Let’s try it.”
 
(It worked out just fine. I’m not proud. But success comes in many flavors.)
 
Then came the pizza that I figured would have star potential: the mushroom pizza.

​ABOVE: 6 ounces of raw cremini mushrooms, quartered--big and meaty
 
 
The mushroom is nature’s own meat substitute.
 
The first time I had a mushroom ragù was in a nice restaurant in Chicago that never should have let me in. The vegan pasta sauce was a revelation.
 
The ragù had a meaty texture, it even tasted like meat, and it was almost indistinguishable from the genuine article.
 
So very close to “If ya don’t know, ya won’t know.”

But...why?
 
 
First and foremost, mushrooms are an umami mega bomb.
 
They’ve got high levels of glutamic acid, which is the same amino acid associated with meat and broth and cheese. (Yay, cheese, the “dairy crack” of pizza fame! Cheese with ‘shrooms anybody?)
 
Mushrooms are also fibrous, which gives them a resistant bite similar to another of our favorite fibrous foods: Meat! (See also: muscle fiber.)
 
And in cooking mushrooms, you initiate a Maillard reaction, which develops savory and complex flavors similar to meat.
 
This is why sausage and mushroom is one of my favorite pizzas: so much meat-on-meat flavor!
 
 
And it’s also why I enjoy roasting mushrooms—and decided to do it for this pizza.
 
For pizza, I normally roast mushroom slices. But this time, I went for bulk. About 6 ounces of quartered “Baby Bella” mushroom caps.

​Inspired by a recipe I’d seen long ago, I believe at Serious Eats, I threw the 6 ounces of quartered mushroom caps into a bowl with salt, freshly ground black pepper, and a couple of tablespoons of olive oil, and tossed it all around in itself.
 
Then, onto a foil-covered quarter-sheet pan (the foil is a cleanup avoidance tactic) and into a 375-degree oven on the middle rack.

ABOVE: Raw mushrooms ready for the oven.

ABOVE: The same mushrooms after 10 minutes in the oven. So small!


After 10 minutes, remove the pan and drain off the liquid. (Save the liquid for something else! It tastes great!)

Then, the mushrooms go back into the oven for another 30 minutes or so.

ABOVE: The same mushrooms after a total 40 minutes of roasting. Even smaller!


​Small, black and beginning to wrinkle.
 
Yes, those mushrooms might look a bit suspicious.
 
Take a bite, and all suspicion evaporates.

ABOVE: A non-vegetarian pizza showing the roasted mushrooms alongside (yes) alligator sausage. (It's a Southern thing. Alligator sausage tastes great--probably because there's so much pork involved.)


The mushrooms are now a bomb-tastic explosion of salty, peppery, umami intensity.
 
For topping the pizza, I sliced some white onion very thin.
 
I also added the garlic that I forgot to put on the Veg Head pizza. (These things happen.)
 
All that atop my standard sauce along with some shredded low-moisture whole-milk mozzarella and grated pecorino Romano.
 
And when it came out of the oven, I garnished it with roasted pistachios.


What? Using pistachios sounds a little crazy?
 
Ever since Chris Bianco (at world-famous Pizzeria Bianco in Phoenix) made it fashionable to put pistachios on pizza, I’ve been pistachio pizza curious. And I did what I often do after coming up with a potentially hare-brained idea.
 
I googled it to see who else was equally hare-brained as I.
 
Seems the Italians are with me on that whole thing about mushrooms and pistachios, as well as a plethora of pistachio-inspired Italian-style cooks in (where else?) California and elsewhere.
 
 
Some of the world’s best pistachios are apparently grown at the base of Mount Etna in Sicily and are DOP protected.
 
I’ve seen Etna pistachios available shelled on Amazon for about $100 a pound. (Yes, that’s an affiliate link—but not because I‘m suggesting you buy them. I’m the kind of guy who likes to see such madness for myself, so I’m sharing.)
 
Reviews suggest they are indeed an excellent product. I’m just not sure that I’m ready to assume responsibility for such a lavish pizza topping that ranks somewhere between artisan pepperoni and edible gold leaf.
 
 
Anyway, Wonderful brand pistachios will do the job.
 
I used roasted salted because I like the roasted crunch and I’m a salt hound and I’m also going to be eating a lot of pistachios from the leftovers in the bag.
 
You may feel free to use them unsalted or even raw.
 
But the real reason we’re here is for the roasted mushrooms.
 
Try them on pizza. Use them in pasta. Serve them as a snack!
 
This is an all-purpose technique (it’s not even really a recipe) that almost anybody can make work.
 
Enjoy!
 
 
SIMPLE INSTRUCTIONS FOR ROASTED MUSHROOMS
 
For topping a 12-ich pizza, put 6 ounces of quartered mushroom caps into a bowl with salt, freshly ground black pepper, and a couple tablespoons of olive oil. Toss.
 
Spread on a quarter-sheet pan and slide it onto the middle rack in a 375-degree oven.
 
After 10 minutes, remove the pan and drain off the liquid.
 
Return mushrooms to the oven for another 30 minutes (check on them after 20).
 
Remove from oven when done and allow to cool. Or eat them all right there. Your choice.

​Enjoy!
 
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